One/Changemaking one change at a time

Earth Day and Good Friday fell on the same day this year and as I result I saw each in a new light.  The day before I thought about how I wanted to participate in each.  It turns out that the two harmonize well with each other.  As a practice for Good Friday and Earth Day, I didn’t turn the lights on all day, turned off my phone and the computer and spent a lot of time outside with Finn.  When Kendall got home from work he joined us in the practice.  We used a candle at night when it was needed.  It was an incredibly peaceful day that was full of much meaning for us.

An unexpected result of this practice was that I felt present.  My full attention was going toward whatever I was doing. I didn’t know what time it was and so I just listened to myself and to Finn.  It was meaningful and meditative.  Its impact was profound.  I felt the presence of the Spirit of God.  It also made me very aware of how much I turn on the lights or use the computer or my phone unnecessarily–simply out of habit I would find myself heading to use them and then catch myself, remembering that I was fasting.  It did my mind and spirit so much good to have a break from being pulled in so many different directions.  Our energy goes where our mind goes.  Not mentally juggling e-mail, texts, time, and everything that is available to me on my computer meant that my mind stayed with what I was doing.  Thus, what I focused on and put my Self toward was more rewarding and left me with more energy rather than feeling drained.

Earth Day.

This year for the first time I celebrated St. Patrick’s Day.  I never remember celebrating it growing up and I don’t know whether this is true or not, but I have always remembered thinking that all the wearing green, dying rivers green, and drinking green beer was for Americans.  And, that most American’s used it as an occasion for getting drunk.

I know it’s judgmental.

But I was born in Northern Ireland.  Most of my extended family still lives there.  We moved to America when I was young.  I am Irish, but I have no accent.  I used to have to “translate” when my mom spoke because people couldn’t understand her English through her accent.  My full name, with my maiden name, is “very Irish” as people say.  I never say that one of the interesting things about me is that I am Irish.  Growing up whenever people asked me if I was Irish I would say, “yes”…because I was and still am.  And I would always hear in response that they were also Irish, but I wanted to say, “No you’re not.  You’re American!”  Instead, I would say, “Oh.”

I know, this is a very snotty side to me.  Looking at it now I see that what I have really wanted was to hold onto my roots because I felt like I had lost them when we moved here.  I am not American, but I also felt like I wasn’t exactly Irish either.  No accent.  No history.  Very few memories of growing up in Ireland.  Americans even seemed to know more about Ireland than I did because they traveled to see and explore Ireland.  We traveled to see family that happened to live in Ireland.

This year, however, I understood the desires of Americans to hold onto their family history, their family stories, their family roots.  I came to this understanding because I wanted to pass that part of me along to my son.  I wanted him to know that part of his story, part of the history of his family, part of the blood running through his body is Irish.  And, in sharing that with him, telling him stories and checking out books from the library, I also found more of my own roots.

My son has the ability to completely change my perspective.  And, while I can be jaded and cynical about things.  I can also choose to see things as opportunities.  I think Earth Day is one of those things.  It can be an opportunity to reflect, to learn, to celebrate, to become aware, and to do something.  I hope that many of you will see tomorrow, Earth Day, as an opportunity for yourself and if you have them, your little ones.

Cheers!  To growing roots.

As we have come to realize that living a financially sustainable life is important to us being able to living a holistically sustainable life, we have arrived at a method that works for us…most of the time.

We have put all our debt on a dry erase board with the total at the top and have it visible in our home.  It is a reminder to us that we have debt we are working to pay off and an encouragement when we feel discouraged that our choices are making a difference to the financial well-being of our family.

In pursuing this we need to remind each other often that we are limiting our spending so that we can pay off our debt.  We are changing how our brains think about finances and that does not happen quickly or easily.  We are creating new grooves in our brain!

Having a budget that we are legalistic about does not work for our family. So, in the stead of a budget Kendall and I talk to each other about finances, spending, and our debt regularly.  After trying many strategies we have found that this is what works for us.  We often ask the question when it comes to spending, “How does this fit into our No Spending Spree?”  It means that we are regularly evaluating priorities and doing cost-benefit analysis when deciding whether or not to spend money.  It means that we take into account the whole picture of what sustainability means to our family; looking at all the pieces.  In order to do this well we have to know what our priorities are.  There are many things that are important to us or that we really want, that we just cannot afford to pay for right now.  And, when we feel frustrated about this situation we remind ourselves or each other of the importance of acceptance, that this is the path we have chosen, and that it is not our money.  We try to gain a greater perspective on what it is that we are so upset about not being able to have and usually find that there is some greater underlying reason for our feeling.

It also means that there are things we do decide to spend money on. However, it often takes on a different form than it did before.  We are more thoughtful and creative about our solutions:

• We shop at home.  This is a phrase that I learned from a friend and I love it.  We use what we already have and supplement (often creatively) what we don’t.
• We have found that when we open our eyes, that living in the city is a great place to just find things for free (Also, knowledge gained from friends).
• We do a lot more repairing, fixing up, and mending, which often turns out to be fun.  Before we would have thrown or given the item away or not thought to purchase a certain item because it is not exactly what we had in mind.  Now, we get to learn all this new stuff.  The kind of stuff I used to always ask people, “How’d you know that?”.  And when, what needs to be fixed up or repaired is out of our league we pay a tradesperson who is great at their job to do it.

This path is long and often it is hard.  This path has also unintentionally led us to lead a more environmentally sustainable life.  It has caused us to choose do what is better for our family and in many ways that has resulted in providing us with better time together as a family.  This path led us to go camping for our family vacation last summer with our then little 9 month old baby and it was one of the best times we have had together.  It has also opened us up to our community.  We have needed others to help us financially at times and we have also received great amounts of generosity as those in our community spontaneously shower us with help, love, and fun gifts.

We live a more mindful life now and as a result we live a life that is closer to the ideals we value.  I will not downplay how hard it can be and how much we feel like we are missing out sometimes, but without even the slightest hesitation I can say that this is by far better for our family.  Through a ripple effect, living a financially sustainable life has brought us a much richer quality of life, whereas, the life we were living “mired in debt” bought us a life of stuff and stress.

Kendall and I have been working on paying off our debt.  We have quite a bit of it.  Most of it is student loans, but there are other significant bits of debt too.  It has accumulated over the years, in various ways for various reasons.  While I have never felt that living in debt was okay, and have constantly been stressed out by our debt, we have treated debt as normal. We saw it as being a normal part of adult life.  So, we made our monthly payments, but we have also made many trips to visit our families, gone on vacations, and spent money as if we didn’t have debt and it was our money to spend.  All the while, doing our best to be financially responsible.  Credit was our way to live the lifestyle we wanted and at the time, it was outside our realm of thinking that this was anything but acceptable.

Over the past few years though, this has been changing.  We began to understand that living a sustainable life extended beyond “being green”.  We finally realized what debt actually was: we owed people money.  This way of living was so completely normalized to us, that this completely obvious fact was hidden from our awareness.  The money that we were earning was not ours, we owed it to other people, even if those “other people” were creditors. Coming to this understanding has completely changed the way we live and it is HARD.

While debt did not exactly sneak up on us, it has taken us years to figure out the impact this debt has on our lives.  Interest rates, monthly payments, the accruement of debt, etc. has bound us.  We were living beyond our own financial sustainability. For years now we have been working (increasingly, as our understanding has increased) to free ourselves from our own debt.  There are times when we want to quit and there are times when we do (but we always get back to our “No Spending Spree”) .  But, our main financial objective is to live a sustainable life and to provide our son with an example of financial responsibility that we never had growing up.

A friend of ours told us about a project that his brother and sister-in-law are endeavoring on. They are Jonny and Michelle, boutique photographers, and the couple behind Paper Antler. Their work is beautiful and captivating. Looking through their photos I see hope, love, romance, passion, adventure, and an unquenchable joy for life. Their desire is to bring together their passions–their gift for capturing the beauty of the world around them and social justice– through the Fifty Nifty project. One of the things that I really love is that it will only work if others join them. We need each other and the success of this project is dependent on more than just this lovely couple. It isn’t safe. It is risky. They are putting themselves out there with faith that they will be joined and that is beautiful.

Fifty Nifty:

• Beginning in January of 2012, Jonny and Michelle will begin an adventure that will span one year.
• Their goal: photograph 50 weddings in 50 states in 50 weeks donating $1000 from each wedding to She Dances for a total donation of $50,000. While this is their ideal goal, their primary goal is to raise $50,000 for She Dances in 50 weeks.
• She Dances is an anti-human trafficking organization that they have worked closely with over the years.
• $50,000 would assist She Dances in sustaining their current safe home in Honduras for one year or allow them to open a new safe home in another place of need.
• They have a route mapped out, so check it out to see if they will be in your area when you or someone you know is getting married. Download this PDF for information about their route.
• Spread the word.

Paper Antler‘s blog will have updates on Fifty Nifty bookings and other Fifty Nifty related news.

This New Year’s Eve Kendall and I were having a small conversation over how the New Year that we celebrate does not internally feel like we are entering a new year; we join in the tradition, but it feels like forcing a puzzle piece that does not fit.  Perhaps, it is simply that we want the time to soak in the Glory of Christmas AND to not rush into the precious, tender, and joyful act of seeing and recounting the movement of our life thus far and ponder over–dream, wish, plan–the year to come.  Maybe, it is also because the symbolism and meaning we have associated with the turning of the calendar to a New Year resonates with Kendall and I more at the turning of Spring- a time when we emerge from the low energy of Winter and are greeted in our awakening by new life.

So, this year we did things a little differently.  We relaxed, did a little reminiscing, a little looking forward, a champagne toast at midnight, and a lot of enjoying the company of one another.  Kendall and I would love to hear some of your traditions and where you are in life.  If you would like to, make yourself at home and share a comment below.  We are looking forward to hearing from you!

A creamery that is dear to our hearts has encountered some financial difficulties because the FDA shut them down and seized all their cheese.  The Estrella Family Creamery makes wonderful cheese and are an extremely generous and kind family.  Actually, my request for what I wanted to eat after I gave birth included a spread of their cheese.  There are many details surrounding what the Estrella’s and their creamery are in the midst of.  One thing I do know is that their cheese is safe to eat, we have eaten it for years, they eat it and feed it to their children, and many others have partaken in the joy of consuming their cheeses and no one has ever become ill.  Making cheese is their passion and they would just like to get back to creating and feeding.

We have added them to our “Give A Gift” section on One/Change and you can read the details of their situation by going to the website that was set up to distribute information about their legal battle with the FDA.  There is also a Celebrity Chef Fundraising Dinner and Press Conference on the calendar for Jan. 22nd. The event will be hosted by chef Roy Breimann at the beautiful Cedarbrook Lodge in Seattle, WA.  Folks at Farm to Consumer Legal Defense Fund are helping with event coordination. Watch the website for more information on obtaining tickets — soon! It looks a couple of great speakers will be present.

I have been writing this blog for almost 5 years now and in starting it I simply wanted to share what I was learning and how to make changes that would be better for the environment.  Since then I have continued to grow and change, my life has grown and changed, and as a result so has the blog.

What I have felt compelled to write about has always blossomed from what I am learning.  This has led me to regularly question whether or not what I want to write about, falls underneath the umbrella of what One/Change is all about.  Which, of course leads to the question: What is One/Change about?  Until today, I have not come up with a satisfying answer.

I stumbled upon the answer when I was preparing for another post.  Kendall and I were discussing what a good introduction would be and we decided on something like, “As you know we have been examining all aspects of our life….” and I realized that this is something that I say, in one form or another, in the majority of my posts.  It took me 5 years to see it, but today it finally hit me, this is really what, at its most basic level, One/Change is for us.  We are constantly examining our lives, learning, changing, and growing.  This space has become a beautiful place for us to share our personal experience of this and, when others are willing to, for them to share theirs.

One of the things I am most grateful for with regard to this blog, is that, as we have written about this part of our lives, you all have graciously received our hearts and words with warmth and encouragement.  Thank you for that.